If there’s a single negative element that comes from setting goals, it’s that the pursuit of these goals often leaves us focused solely on the future with little appreciation for the present.
It’s all too easy to get caught up in setting benchmarks, accomplishing tasks, and conquering whatever missions lie ahead, and forgetting completely about enjoying the ride and being thankful for what we already have.
We’ve all heard, or used, the ever so common “I’ll be happy when…” statement.
I’ll be happy when…
- I get a promotion
- The kids graduate
- Friday is here
- I get a raise
- I’m older
- I retire
- I get into college
- I graduate from college
- I get that new car/house/vacation/stuff
And the list could go on forever.
The problem with waiting for these moment to finally be happy is that those moments are fleeting in the grand scheme of things.
Accomplishing a goal often happens in a second, such as making a large sale, closing a valuable client, or getting a raise or promotion. As soon as it happens the novelty starts to wear off and we’re right back to our “I’ll be happy when…” list.
The “Someday Mentality”
I was a victim of the someday mentality for my entire early life. I remember waiting to get into college to be happy, and then waiting to graduate, and then waiting for my dream job. Each time I accomplished something I put my happiness on hold until I could achieve my next goal and when I finally achieved my ultimate goal (obtaining my dream job at the time) and found I was no happier, I felt more lost and empty then before.
The problem lies in putting all your hopes and dreams in the future, without paying the present the respect it deserves.
Tomorrow never comes. The destination IS the journey. And the truth is, if you’re not grateful for what you have now, it’s unlikely you’ll be grateful for what you get in the future.
Gratitude is a choice.
I’ve always been a big proponent of setting and achieving goals. Goals give us direction, guidance, structure, and provide a target off in the distance that gives us something to stretch for, grow for, and to become more than we are today.
But these goals need to be balanced with a healthy appreciation for what we already have, no matter how little that may be. As long as you’re living in a free and democratic society you have something to be thankful for and the potential to achieve all of your dreams, as I wrote about in this article on how many of the most successful people today came from poverty, abuse, or homelessness.
Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” - Oprah Winfrey
Here are 6 ways to start developing an attitude of gratitude today.
1. Keep a gratitude journal
Remind yourself daily of 3 things you’re thankful for in each area of your life. What are you thankful for in your relationships, work, health, possessions, and previous experiences.
2. Watch your thoughts
Don’t allow yourself to dwell on negative circumstances for long. Recognize they exist, take action to correct them, and move on.
3. Watch you words
Try to not complain for 7 straight days. It will be a challenge at first but you’ll find over time you feel better, more grateful, and overall happier.
4. Spend time with friends and family
Reconnect with those that matter most in your life, even if it’s only a simple phone call.
5. Help someone
Volunteering can help decrease depression and help you live longer. Not to mention you’re making the world a better place one person at a time.
6. Give someone a compliment
It will force you to find the positive, and make them feel good at the same time.
The best time to be happy is now. Of course you should still have goals, and dreams, and ambitions, but make sure to remember to enjoy the ride. Life is a journey, not a destination.
